It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize
