My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
