I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
