you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Randomize
