she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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