I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
I'm passing your future prison.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Randomize