She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize