Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
We left the knife in your bed.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
