I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
