can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
