Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
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