whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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