Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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