Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Randomize
