Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
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