# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
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