chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
