i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
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