if i can run in heels then i can drive
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Randomize