Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize
