Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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