if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
Randomize