I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize
