gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
she peed on how many people?
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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