she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Randomize