I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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