My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
No subtext here. People are naked.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Randomize
