Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
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