I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize
