# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
