Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
