the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
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