So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
