it wasn't lemon gatorade
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Randomize
