remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Randomize
