I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
