at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
