At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
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