What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
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