Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
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