He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
