she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Houston, we have a squirter
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
Randomize
