Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
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