After last night, I could never be a politician.
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Randomize