Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
my liver is dry heaving
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Randomize
