You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
