You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Randomize
