I love black thongs
He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
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