Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
farters have to be the big spoon...
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
When did angry sex become our thing?
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
