i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
