Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
My penis needs a shock collar
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
